Sometimes when I look at her, I can't stop. She is.. this beautiful gift of grace, a wonder of mystery waiting to be fully discovered, like a budding flower yet to open. This sprite of girl turning young woman. A creation mimicking His glory and then I see too the amazement God must feel and see in each of His creations, the depth of love He feels in His child. It appears like moments frozen in time; photographs and memories held in my mind.
I love the sharp wit and the sometimes thoughtful, delayed humour. The perfectly smooth lines of face. I see the playful 2 year old spraying the hose and pouring over books, the keen learning 5 year old with a mind that is a true gift, the tentative, crafting and fun loving 8 year old, and the struggling, yet somehow secure 13. Now turning, as if before my very eyes into graceful strength and courage.. and wisdom that appeared from somewhere. I heard a friend of a 2 week old say how fast her baby was growing up already, and thought to myself, " you have no idea yet". I dare not look ahead to what lies waiting, the joys and heartaches yet to face on her own journey. My heart feels too full to imagine she was entrusted to me, for me to show her beauty and how to live, how to follow the heart of Jesus. What a mess I must be making that anyone would follow me, but I am the chosen one for this task. And so we have grace for one another. And I realize my need for HIM. To let more of myself disappear and more of Himself to take over.