Monday, February 6, 2012

Diagnosis

So looks like I most probably have an ACL tear.  I saw the Sports medicine doc today and am waiting for an MRI to confirm.  So just dealing with feeling stupid, wishing I had quit sooner, people's comments about what happened, and generally feeling bummed.  You can call me Robo-Mom with my new brace that I get to wear for a bit.  I'll have to decide if I want surgery if that is the diagnosis.  I guess you can opt not to have it, but it does limit you somewhat.  I think I'm too young to be limited somewhat, even though I will be quitting some of the things I love to do.  Most people seem to have good results with surgery, but I'll be asking around, so if you have some opinions or stories let me know.

In the meantime, I've come across some super cute photos to brighten your day, or maybe just mine :)

Cute wedding attendants a few year ago.  Time goes... is spent...
 Look at those little twins with Jacob!

I like this blog post today, and thought of someone dear who has just lost someone very dear. Talking about the passing of time... loss... I don't write like she can, so enjoy her:

"My father said that the day Aimee was killed, he looked across the fields and a neighbor kept plowing his dirt. Kept going about his work, breaking open the earth and turning it over.
When we’d have to cut open the earth and lay down a child, a daughter, a sister.
My father said he was madly wild to go over there and rip the keys right out of that tractor."
How could anyone go about ordinary time when nothing was now ordinary time?

The washing machine, it just keeps spinning, spinning on and on.
I haven’t enjoyed all the moments – some of them have just about killed me. 
But to wake to the moments and embrace the moments, all of them, the exhaustingly hard and the wildly good and the ugly beautiful, because God only comes to us through the moments. And He isn’t only in some moments, abandoning us in others."
  
"God seizes the days: God seizes time and uses it as an instrument to transform. God seizes every moment to sculpt souls and shape lives and transform ashes into glory. What if isn’t so much about seizing kairos moments and surviving chronos moments — but seeing all as Christ-filled moments? That God seizes the moment to make me more like Christ and what if I seized more of the moments, because there is something of my Savior in them?
Be present – because the present is just that – a present. A gift. No one has to carpe diem, seize the day, of everyday chronos time — we can all grind our teeth through as many of the difficult moments we want – and miss who knows how much of our life? How do you know which moments are the kairos moments to seize — and the chronos ones to merely survive"


So I think what is the diagnosis of my heart?  What is it God wants to do with me during this?  Not to just endure the time til the next thing, but to embrace the moments. Only to be more transformed to His glory.

2 comments:

Randi~Dukes and Duchesses said...

So sorry about the ACL. I'd opt for surgery. I have a number of friends who have had it and the recovery was quick and great. They're back to running and enjoying life. Mind you, that's here in the States. :)

Linda said...

Ya today they told me I could get an MRI in MAY!!! Who knows how long til surgery.