Sunday, May 6, 2012

I listed our outside playground on K town's classifieds and had 2 phone calls within the evening.   We once sold a truck in several hours.  By last night it was taken all apart and gone this morning.  I'm kind of sad, or maybe just a bit nostalgic.  Kevin built it for the kids when we moved in, and there have been so many hours and memories stored up there.  Tea parties on top, and water slides, water balloon fights and forts, and endless sandbox creations.  Last year I asked the kids if they were done playing there, and Jacob wasn't quite.  It's nice to have around for other kids and nephews who come visit.  But in my spring mode of purging and makin' an few extra bucks, off it went.  He's grown up and changed so much in the last months, I knew he was done.  He's 14!!  I can't believe somehow I blinked and I'm middle aged and feeling like it!  Next time I blink, where will I be?

I have this slide show that runs in my mind sometimes.  Memories that in that moment I have thought of freezing them in time, to re-remember, especially on a lazy, sunlit evening.  They play in my head recreating the scene, but mostly the feelings I felt in them.  They are all good moments, like strumming guitar on the back porch of our farm house watching E pulling baby Jacob in a wagon down the long drive, the barn back lit with the setting sun.  The laughter and joy in the special moment of taking our last big family photo together at Duck Lake.  E making that 2'3" jump clean round on horse back, KD smiling at me from down the end of the aisle.  Boys filling up the van and laughing in the back, just like last night. Dance party when I turned 40.  Sitting on the porch at Sundre watching the sun go down and feeling God so thick and healing in that summer.  The super full moon shining on a fully blooming cherry tree!!  Him holding my hand.

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